What I want

What I want

what I wantI was thinking about what I want.

What I really want.

Often I’m ambivalent around what I want and what I actually get reflects my mixed wish.

Today when it’s more out in the open (like a bird that usually hides in the forest but suddenly is willing to be seen), I’ll say it clearly as I can:

I want a room with others where there’s time and space to bring what’s most true to the fore. Where it’s welcome.

A place where I discover what I really think.

Participation in a group culture where it’s cool to not know.

Where experimentation is valued and we learn to make mistakes.

Where we can speak things that there’s been no context for, but now there is.

Where the walls of what we thought was possible keep moving back.

Where we see with surprise that others are exploring the same territory as we are.

Where unexamined assumptions fade away like songs you suddenly realize you don’t like any more.

Where we continually learn new distinctions and discernments that arise by themselves and that we’d never realized were “a thing” before.

Where what we don’t know in the unknown future seems a better bet than what we do know in the known past.

Where we feel lost and somebody else has just the right thing.

Where we experience that there’s a greater whole in charge of the process. (And that it is a process.)

Where the curriculum emerges as we go.

Where we don’t totally freak out realizing that the unknown future is very much up to us and our efforts (and our non-efforts) and that what we most want is what everyone wants and maybe the only thing there is to want.

That’s what I want today! It’s a lot to want. But the clearer I say it the more likely it seems.

Click here for information about the Listening Circle open call this Wednesday.